Will You Walk With Me?
"Be sure of this - that I am with you always, even to the end of the world." Jesus says this in the 28th chapter of the Gospel of Matthew when He tells the disciples that He will be with them as they go out into the world and face the many challenges that will occur as they travel on their journey.
Was this a story just for a select group of people at a particular time and place or does it apply to us today?
Have you ever taken one step forward and then taken two steps back? Or maybe 3 or 4 steps back?
Have you ever struggled to pick yourself up when you are in the depths of depression or anxiety?
Have you ever asked yourself, does anyone really care about me?
I'm sure we have all felt that way at one time or another and when we are in those spaces, we can feel isolated, cut off from family, friends, from everyone.
When we feel isolated, we start to wonder if we can ever really overcome the pain and isolation. We wonder if God is really there for me.
Join us, on Will You Walk With Me?, where we will explore ways to strengthen our faith through caring for our mental and physical health. We will do this in community, learning from those who join our episodes to share their stories, and through exploring ways to increase creativity and positive self esteem, while in the process studying sacred scriptural texts that can support your journey.
So I ask you, Will You Walk With Me?
Will You Walk With Me?
Journey Towards Peace: Uniting Faith and Mental Health
Do you wonder how to find peace in the midst of life's trials and tribulations? It's time to debunk the myth that peace is reliant on external circumstances. Instead, let's embrace a peace that surpasses all understanding; a divine peace rooted in trust and faith. Together, we'll explore how to tap into this transformative power and invite you on a healing journey, one that intertwines the grace of God and the warmth of our community. Let's walk hand in hand and foster our relationship with Him, discovering peace amidst chaos. Let's walk towards a blessed future, hand in hand.
Lee 2 2. Hello and welcome to the first episode of Will you Walk With Me. My name is Reverend Dr Kathy Sklenar Studwell. I'm an Episcopal priest in Northern New Jersey and I have a Doctor of Ministry degree focusing on learning about the art of inviting a scene in the Gospel of John and First John. I also have an undergraduate degree in psychology, but would consider my many years in my own personal therapy as more helpful in my own life, ministry and what I would like to use as a foundation for the discussions on this podcast.
Speaker 1:My producers, andrew and Catherine, came to me with an idea about doing a podcast to talk about the Bible and other sacred texts and the cool ministries we have at our church, st Bartholomew's. I think they might have seen the perplexed look on my face when they first approached me and after a period of silence, andrew asked me well, kathy, what is on your heart? Where did I think God was leading me? And I automatically knew the answer. I wanted to talk about how Jesus walks with us in the challenges of life. More specifically, where is Jesus when we are facing anxiety, depression, other mental health crisis?
Speaker 1:The title of my podcast, will you Walk With Me, came from my personal experience of isolation and fear of a lonely prison of my own making. If I said isolation and fear to people who know me, they would look at me with a really strange look and say something like you, isolation. I am an outgoing person who loves to meet people. I'm blessed with a great husband, children, my dogs, family, friends, a wonderful congregation spiritual director and a trusted therapist who I have been with for many years. Therapy has been a strong part of my self-care program, along with yoga, meditation and a new study that I've been working on, mindfulness. We will talk about these great tools in future episodes.
Speaker 1:But getting back to isolation, the pandemic was really, is really a sneaky enemy for me. It was not just fear of an illness, but also having to shut down many aspects of my life. Whatever your personal take is on how social activity should have been handled during the pandemic, I chose to stay at home, my children were in virtual school and I hosted Zoom church from my office. Don't get me wrong I believe Zoom was and continues to be a gift from God, but I fell into the trap of thinking that I was still my outgoing self, connecting with people and having many meetings and conversations during the better part of those two years tricked me. My husband continued to work outside of the home, so his experience was different, but my children and I, we were in our protective bubble. We could do lots and lots of episodes about the effects of the pandemic on mental health and we will talk about it in future episodes but I think we are just beginning to see the effects of the pandemic on mental health. I'm sure that most of you have heard stories on TV or radio about social and academic challenges that children are facing, but this is not just an issue for children or young adults. It affects every generation. So, as we welcomed in 2022, my husband and I decided that it was time for our children to return to in-person school.
Speaker 1:There were lots of bumps with the re-entry back into in-person life, but over time, things began to settle in. For me, it seemed that around the fall of 2022, someone turned the switch of life on and told everyone to get up and make up for all the lost time. I felt like I was being thrown out into the world and told to pick up exactly where I left off two years ago. I felt like I hadn't been to the gym in over two years which is true and I was wildly out of shape. I constantly felt like I was trying to catch my breath, getting back into in-person living, as much as I was ready to go and wanted to embrace life and all that it has to offer. I was also afraid to be in the outside world, not necessarily because I was afraid of catching COVID, but I had been isolated physically and, more importantly, emotionally, for almost two years and I didn't realize the emotional impact it had on me. So I went in full-on, locked in and jumped back into life my church, my kids, everything. Instead of focusing on me, I felt empty. Also during that time, my therapist had been diagnosed with a serious illness and had to take a step back from her practice. So not only was I missing my trusted friend and advisor to talk with, but there was also the fear of the possibility of someone else dying.
Speaker 1:And then, in February of this year, a very special person in my life tried to end her pain by physically hurting herself. I'll never forget the pain I felt when I found out what happened. I knew that she was struggling emotionally with many issues and that she had withdrawn from social activities, but I never suspected that she would attempt anything that could cause a tragedy. Despite God, her attempt was unsuccessful, by the grace of God, and a flicker of light which was inside of her led her to immediately ask for help because she knew she was in trouble, and I'm happy to share that. She's working very hard at strengthening her light, finding her voice and developing her power.
Speaker 1:For me, I remember trying to be there for her to sit and listen, to laugh and cry together as she moved through those initial days, weeks and months. All along. I knew my light was flickering and I was losing energy. I was so consumed with trying to exist that I had no energy, creativity or passion to thrive. When I was talking to someone about life in general, one day I made the statement that my best friend was my Google Calendar, because he kept me focused on the tasks of my day or week. After saying that, I remember thinking uh-oh, houston, we have a problem. And then came the wave of fear. What had happened to me? I immediately reached out for Jesus, but even though intellectually I knew he was with me I absolutely believed in his promise to be with me till the end of the age I did not feel his love. It was all in the academic and intellectual space that I found my walk with Jesus and I knew something was missing.
Speaker 1:A few months later, god led me to join a group on Zoom, but with people from all around the world just a fascinating, wonderful group of people and we were focused on the practice and study of mindfulness. Some of you may know something about this, others may not. It's an episode unto itself. For now, let's say that mindfulness meditation is a mental training practice that teaches you to slow down racing thoughts, let go of negativity and calm both body and mind. What it did for me was help me to reconnect with the passionate parts of me that I had locked away and substituted with daily lists and an obsession of how to just survive. This didn't happen overnight. I am still on that journey of rediscovery and I'm so grateful for God helping me to love life again.
Speaker 1:It was also during this time that I wanted to go back into the sacred texts and find out what I could use for myself and share with others about God's love, jesus' teachings and the power of the Holy Spirit in the storms of life and the challenges of mental health. I began to pray and discern and imagined reaching out to take Jesus' hand so we could walk together in this journey. I asked Jesus to walk with me. I began looking for scriptures about peace. For me, a renewed sense of inner peace was what I was looking for, peace that would help me release the anxiety and depression that led me to emotionally isolate. So in my search, god led me to these pieces of scripture 2 Corinthians 13-11.
Speaker 1:Finally, brothers, rejoice, Aim for perfect harmony, encourage one another, be of one mind, live in peace, and the God of love and peace will be with you. Ephesians 6-23. Peace to the brothers and love with faith from God, our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. Philippians 4-9. Whatever you have learned or received or heard or seen in me, now put it into practice. The God of peace will be with you always.
Speaker 1:Verse Thessalonians 5-23. Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely and may your entire spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. And 2 Thessalonians 3-16. Now may the Lord of peace give himself your peace at all times and in every way. The Lord be with all of you. Now may the Lord of peace himself continually grant you peace in every circumstance, was Paul's prayer and blessing to the Thessalonian believers. As he prepared to draw his letter to a close, he sent them off saying May the Lord be with you all. That's what I was so hungry for To not only know, but to feel the Lord's presence with me.
Speaker 1:It was the Prince of Peace himself that promised to leave his own perfect peace with his confused disciples. Peace I leave with you. They were the reassuring words that Jesus spoke to them as the shadow of the cross loomed closer. Jesus knew that we needed that comfort, that reassurance. My peace I give to you, not the peace that the world gives, but the peace, lord, that can assure us to not be afraid. Christ gave his disciples his own precious promise of peace. His peace, though, is not of this world, but it is the inner peace that heals the whole in our heart. Jesus promised to give us a peace to guard our hearts, to bring rest, comfort and refreshment. Hope, hope, an inner peace that transcends humanity's comprehension. Things of the world that we rely on can make us feel good for a while, but, as for me, when I focused on those things, I seemed to fall back, after a small period of happiness, into the uncomfortable and isolated. But when I could focus on the peace of God, I began to know and feel healing. Look at John 14, 27. Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you, not as the world gives. So let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.
Speaker 1:The biblical concept of peace doesn't focus on the absence of trouble. Biblical peace is unrelated to life circumstances. It transcends them, it supersedes them. It is the goodness of life that is not touched by what happens in the outside world. You can be in the midst of great trials, awesome storms that seem to overwhelm you, and still have the peace of Christ in your heart. The peace Jesus is speaking of enables us to remain calm in the most wildly fearful circumstances. It enables them to hush a cry still a riot, rejoice in pain and sing in the middle of suffering. This peace is never created by circumstances, but instead affects and overrules them. I think we need to hear this message of peace again and again.
Speaker 1:Somehow the passage of time takes a subtle toll on our spirits, because this happens little by little even to the most dedicated people. We do not always notice it. That's exactly what happened to me. Then one day, it suddenly gets so dark we wonder who turned out the lights. How do we, as Christians, advance God's light into the world when we know darkness all too well? How do we share the hope, the joy, the peace of the good news when all the news seems to be overwhelming and sad? If actions really do speak louder than words and I believe that they do then at Christmas God has virtually shouted out to the world how much God cares. God cares enough to enter the place we live and bring light into those dark spots of our lives, spots we cannot seem to light on our own. We're entering the advent and Christmas season in the life of the church. One of the things that brings me lots of joy is looking at Christmas lights. I like blinking ones, blue ones, lights all over the house and sometimes just a few lights on a small tree. Christmas light is about an end to isolation and despair, even in our best efforts where we can't seem to fix it. Christmas light is about hope. When life is at its darkest, christmas light is about a future.
Speaker 1:If God is peace, then to know God is to rest and to refresh in his peace. The closer we draw to him, the more of his peace we can rely on, and the closer we draw to God, we begin to have an expanded knowledge of trust. Trust means having to set our hearts in a place where we focus and believe in God whatever may happen. A tall order, I know. Sometimes we can't seem to even come close. But when we insist on being in control ourselves, we can savage God's passion and desire to let us live in peace. When we choose to worry rather than walk in faith, peace is not ours. Jesus often warned us about fear and worry, and here's a passage from Matthew 6.34, taken from the message translation Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.
Speaker 1:Living in peace can be compared to the petals of a flower unfolding in the morning sunlight. The petals of peace in our lives unfold as we learn more about God. We experience his continual goodness. We read more of his promises, like Psalm 100, for God is sheer beauty, all generous in love. We learn to bask in his overwhelming love for us, as it says in Romans 8.31.32 from the message.
Speaker 1:If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition, exposing himself to the worst by sending his own son. Is there anything else he wouldn't gladly and freely do for us? And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of his chosen? Who would dare even point a finger? The one who died for us, who was raised to life for us, is in the presence of God at this very moment, sticking up for us. We are one of God's chosen and God has got our back. So how do we draw near enough to experience his peace? Jesus said Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them not be afraid.
Speaker 1:The initial peace that comes from having our consciousness cleared grows as we get to know God better. 2 Peter 1.2 says May God give you more and more grace and peace to grow in your knowledge of God and Jesus, our Lord. That's what I needed, and that's from the New Living Translation To know God for myself, not as a priest for my congregation, not as a witness to others. First and foremost, I needed to reconnect with God in my own life, and when we develop a lifestyle of making the Lord our refuge, we begin to live in the peace of God. Psalm 91.1 holds that interesting secret to the peace of God. He that dwells in the place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty, I will say of the Lord. He is my refuge, my fortress. In Him I will trust. That secret place in our hearts is where we go to meet God. When we choose to live there and hide away under His shadow, staying in consistent communion with Him, we can remain peaceful even when circumstances may not be, and when we learn to cry out to Him in times of trouble, we find His peace really does pass all human understanding. Philippians 4-7.
Speaker 1:Well, you may now be saying that's great, she's getting it back together, but nothing can work for me. Believe me, I felt the same way. The emptiness I experienced caused me to scream out to God for help. I didn't know what I was expecting to receive in the moment, but I eventually realized that what I received was the gift of the power to grab on to Jesus' hand so we could walk together. This is not a sudden resolution of pain, but it was the beginning of a journey toward wholeness and peace, something I never expected, but something very powerful.
Speaker 1:I am inviting you to walk with me on this journey, a journey to know the healing, life-giving, life-restoring power of God through His Son, jesus, and the power of the Holy Spirit, and I would like to walk with you. I hope that you will join me in our future episodes, where we will explore other Bible texts in depth. We will talk about books, articles, self-care methods and have conversations with professionals and others who are walking on this journey. One thing before I leave that I want to be sure that you know is that if you are in need of professional help something that I treasure in my own journey and you don't know what to do, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, accessible at 1-800-273-8255. Again, that's 1-800-273-8255. And also modeled after the 911 system. There is a three digit 988 code for your phone's suicide and crisis lifeline and it's a quick number, easy to remember and will connect you with mental health professionals.
Speaker 1:If you would like to reach out to us, to send us a question or a comment, please email podcastatwillyouwalkwithmecom. That's podcastatwillyouwalkwithmecom. I want to thank my producers, andrew and Catherine, who not only have put so much love and care into this podcast, but actually got me started by asking a simple question what's on my heart and I want to thank all of you for listening and, I hope, joining in this community. I pray that each of you see the hand of Jesus extended, reaching out to you, and I hope you know that you are a child of God and are invited to grab on and have a blessed partner for your journey forward. Will you walk with me? I will walk with you.